How I feel right now. You ask me how I feel right now? You want to know? You want to know how I feel... How I REALLY feel?

Ok.

First off, I am comfortable with myself. I like my body, with the exception of the fluff that will put a damper on hot tub season. I like to wear the clothes I own because I think they make me look good. I think I look good. Some might feel self conscious about their appearance... I'm just conscious. Aware. I know what is going on, but I am also ok with the fact that I can't change that. I know that I don't have perfect skin or eye brows. That is ok. If I see myself that way, then you see me that way.

Second, I like being alone. Mostly just because I don't have time to be with someone. Between work, school and homework, I am exhausted daily. That is not to say that I wouldn't mind having someone to cuddle with at night... But, honestly, even if I began to date someone, I feel that I may rush things (again) and it would just be another relationship over too soon. Yes, I like being alone. And what is more, I am good at it. I just need another blanket to protect me from the harshly frigid nights.

Third, I love going to school. I have felt that since I began a few years ago, school has gotten so much more fun and cool. I like seeing my friends everyday, I like learning all the things I am taught, and I love experiencing the incredible happenings that occur. That being said, I hate homework. I do it... but I usually do it right before it is due. I also hate my Spanish class, in addition to my History and Literature class. They suck.

Fourth, I like my job. I've always liked it. I am good at it. Everyone I work with is fun and cool and energetic. I've made some really great friends that I adore. I love that my work recognizes the hard work I do and they've given me raises and promoted me to shift leader. However, I hate when I do dumb things. Things that could have been avoided if I just put more thought into it, or spent more time analyzing the situation. I hate feeling dumb about my performance.

Fifth, I love my friends. Some of them are bitchy on occasion, and some of them are three hours late, but I love them. They make my world go round. I miss quite a few of them; I hope to change that. I want to see a lot of them more often than I do...

Sixth, I feel like the world is falling apart. Yes, we are actually making progress, but as I become more aware of the things going on on this Earth, it actually looks like we are getting worse. When I was little, nothing bothered me. I was so ignorant. My friends actually got me to tell my parents to vote for Bush. Luckily they saw that the opinion of a fourth grader was not valid and voted for Gore instead, but that just shows how little I knew! Now, I see war, death, violence, disease, poverty, hate, etc. It is a terrible place to live. And you can't escape it.

Finally, as always, I believe in the power of love.

I hope you got what you were looking for.